Update 12/3/19: We just got 3 feet of snow in one week and I want to play! I've been browsing all the resort/hill websites today to contemplate the best getaway and I want to put this here as a PSA to everyone with 4th-graders this year (and a reminder to myself for when I have one!) : https://www.spiritmt.com/index.php?slug=fourth-graders-ski-free https://www.skiandboardmn.com/member-program-offerings-20192020-season The rest of the info below is a little dated and I don't feel like updating, but I still think a good place to start when ski dreaming... Anyone know what's up with WhiteCap these days? Are they open yet? At all? Do they have a Magic Carpet? I didn’t really get into skiing when I was a kid. I didn’t learn when I was little (like a lot of my friends did) and then was always just more comfortable reading a book, or playing cards in the chalet. But returning here, it’s become one of the things I look forward to most in the winter. The first winter I was home, Jen brought me a pair of used xc-ski boots and skiis, and there hasn’t been a winter since that I don’t enjoy getting out on the xc-ski trails. There are several options for xc-skiiing up here. Listed in order of my faves: Mt Valhalla Recreation Area has trails and parking lots on either side of County Road C, 8.5 miles north of Washburn. I really love the B-loops of both the Teuton and Valkyrie trails. Fun rolling hills, but nothing too hard or scary. The A-loops are great for learning on too. There is a parking fee (maybe $5) or you can get a season sticker at the Forest Service office or Leino’s Gas Station in Washburn for around $20. Mt Ashwabay has a great system of groomed trails for all abilities and hosts a fun women’s XC-ski group on Wednesday nights with free rentals. The Jerry Jolly Trail has one downhill that is scary, and grooming can be a little less consistent, but otherwise is a beautiful trail, especially along the creek. Dogs are welcome on the first stretch. And it’s fun to ski over to the Ashwabay chalet for a drink. I also really love when Jen and I stop and try a new trail when we're drivng home from visiting friends or family south of us or in the U.P. There are so many to check out! photo by Kaite, Wednesday sunset ride at Mt. Ashwabay Honestly, I've never gotten into downhill skiiing, but in recent years I've started snowboarding, and love it! Jen has started tele-skiing and together we have been taking advantage of the exchange program included with our Ashwabay Season passes, offering one free pass to each of the following ski areas.
***Please confirm hours by checking the website or calling! I wanted to collect this info, so I'd have a go to spot when deciding where to ride next, but I also know that with this type of business especially, hours can change!*** Big Powderhorn in Bessemer, MI OPEN 9am-4pm daily A great hill for beginners, with long gradual runs and little rollers. This is where it really clicked for me and I love to come back. Mt Zion in Ironwood, MI OPEN Tues/Wed/Thurs 2-6pm & Fri 2-9pm through Feb. 26 Friday 4-9pm; Sat 9am-4pm; Sun 12-4pm through end of season We went here in 2018 and it was super fun. Similar size as Ashwabay, but with tubing, a fast lift, and fun run at the top of the hill with lots of little tangents through the trees and homemade jumps. I highly recommend checking it out. Mont Du Lac just west of Superior, WI OPEN Tues-Thurs 4pm-8pm, Friday: 4pm-9pm Saturday: 10am-9pm, Sunday: 10am-6pm A similar feel to Ashwabay, but with less lake affect snow, more night skiiing, and more active bar scene. We went on a Thursday night for "Tunes and Turns" and had a great time despite the icey snow conditions. Mt Ripley in Hancock, MI OPEN Mon-Thurs 3-9pm. Friday 1-9pm Saturday 10am-8pm, Sunday 10am-5pm (shorter hours in March) Another smallish hill, with just three lifts, but it has a few really fun glade runs to cruise through and the main chair lift offers great views of the tricky college kids in the terrain park. The slopes face the west, so on the afternoon when we went it was sunny and the snow was kind of soft (but still fun). We've heard though the mornings after a sunny day can be pretty icy. Porcupine Mtns Ski Area in Ontonagon, MI OPEN Friday Saturday Sunday and Monday 9am-5pm for downhill A small hill with one three-person chair lift and a tow-rope across the top of the mountain, and yet a variety of fun runs, GREAT powder, and the BEST views of the lake. After a few runs we packed a little back-pack with our sandwiches and a couple beers and had a picnic lunch on the top of the mountain. Great for xc-skiiing too! Some year I want to go to the Porkies for a week or long weekend. You can rent the Lodge in the park which has modern facilities and sleeps up to twelve for $190/night (call (906) 885-5275 x 0 to reserve). There is a four-night minimum to book, and I could stay there the whole time and coordinate the trip. Others could come for 1-4 nights. Maybe each night we divide the $190 by however many people are there to determine how much everyone pays. Who's in? :) Also part of the Ashwabay Season Pass exchange program: Chester Bowl in Duluth, MN OPEN Mon/Thurs/Fri 4:30-8:30pm; Sat&Sun 11am-4:30pm and Marquette Mountain in Marquette, MI OPEN Mon/Tues 11am-5pm; Wed-Fri 11am-8:30pm; Saturday 10am-8:30pm; Sunday 10am-5pm March 20th thru April 12th – call ahead as times change due to conditions. We have yet to check these two out, mostly because we have enjoyed going to some of the bigger hills nearby that aren't part of the exchange program, but offer a local rate Sunday through Thursdays (which is when Jen and I have been more available to get away for a ski day). WhiteCap south of Saxon, WI OPEN 9am-4pm daily maybe call ahead to be sure (715) 561-2227 I couldn't find the local rate listed on the website, but it was half price when we went last year, so $22.50 for a full day adult lift ticket or $19 for a half day. This place is really... retro? But super fun, has a cute little ski-in wine hut, and we've been told is cool with people bringing in their own food and drinks too. Indianhead just east of Ironwood OPEN Daily 9am-4pm and Blackjack OPEN Saturday 9am-8pm, Sunday 9am-4pm Local Rate is $30/day, kids 9&under are FREE with an Adult lift ticket The closest big hill, but I'd rather not give them my money until they change their name/imagery Spirit Mountain in Duluth, MN OPEN Mon-Fri 10am-8pm; Sat 9am-8pm; Sun 9am-6pm They don't offer a local rate that I know of, but it seems if you buy ahead online, you can get a pretty good deal mid-week. I just looked it up for next Tuesday and was quoted $25 for an adult lift ticket. Giants Ridge almost to Ely, MN OPEN Mon-Thurs 9:30am-4:30pm, Fri-Sun 9am-8pm Didn't see a local deal. Only $18 from 4-8pm. Lutsen Mountains south of Grand Marais, MN OPEN Mon-Fri 9:30AM-4:00PM, Sat/Sun 9am-4pm From their website: "There are many nice ski hills in the Midwest, but only one true mountain resort. By any measure – vertical rise, variety of terrain, resort facility, value – there is no comparison." Of course this also means lift tickets are $82/day. Because of the distance to get there, and lack of a local discount, it seems the Getaway Package would be the best way to go-- two days skiing and two nights lodging for under $300 a couple. They also offer $39 lift tickets if their season extends past April 8. Mount Bohemia north of Houghton, MI OPEN Mon-Fri 10:30am-4:30pm, Sat&Sun 9:30am-5pm (some nights later) This place has a lot of hype and likely the best snow conditions. Lift tickets are $62 "any day, any age, any time" or you can buy a 10-year season pass for $599
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With a fat beet. Yikes. Over five months since our last blog post. It’s been on my mind to write. Little notes here and there. But only now creating the time, to sit at my laptop with my back to the woodstove, wet hair drying after another nice fall run and shower. Fall has been more relaxed than summer for sure, but still kind of busy-- farm wrap-up, vacationing, negotiating winter work, finalizing details to finally build our house, out and abouting with O.… Today I brought him to the farm to hang with my parents for the afternoon. My mom was in the kitchen in the midst of a batch of pickled beets. It’s a good beet year in the garden. She told me she had harvested two large bags already and encouraged me to go out and harvest more. I have a goal though to enjoy and use the garden, but not let it stress me out. I enjoyed planting a couple heads of garlic in one of our raised beds with Oscar this morning, but was ready to move on with my day. I did incorporate beets into our dinners this week, a sheet pan dinner, and this awesome crockpot borsht that uses beets, carrots, cabbage, and venison (subbed for the beef). I’m partly making a point to write this post now, so I can find the recipe link again under my soup tag. This blog, for me, is both a way to connect and share, and a place to record and file away recipes, memories, books/articles, places to visit, etc. Blog posts coming soon (maybe) on my recent recommended reading and U.P. vacation spots. (In six words: the latest Sherman Alexie and Marquette.) This time last year, Kaite and I were dreaming and writing this blog into existence. I don’t need it in the same way this year, but I’m glad it’s here, and I wanted to say hi. Need any beets?
“We didn’t even fight at all!” Jen exclaimed, as we recounted our trip, and what a good one it was for all of us. Ate seafood almost every day, even a serendipitous Easter dinner of Chicken Oscar at Little Bohemia on our drive home. Warm temps, visiting friends and family along the way, a kayak, a hike, a couple new kites, some well-researched spots to eat and lay our head, a kiddo that was content on planes and long days in the car, and even decided he was down for using the toilet regularly. Two weeks ago we flew to Tampa via a night in Chicago and reconnecting with a couple of my friends from college-- acquaintances then really, but who I share Chicago with and love getting to know better when our paths cross. Hopefully in our backyard next. :) We flew to Tampa for three reasons. 1) It’s the cheapest flight south. 2) We went for a week last year and were sad to leave. We loved what we were able to explore and had more we wanted to check out. I don’t remember fighting on that trip either. Maybe we’re getting our family vacation groove on. Or maybe it’s just Florida. 3) The main reason really: A friend of ours had found a nice used Jeep for us to buy and drive home. We stayed at this funky Airbnb in Gulfport, FL. The accommodations (and Gulfport) were relaxed, everything you need, not too manicured (which is a plus when bring a kid along), affordable, and half-way between hip St. Petersburg and the Gulf coast beaches. I think I could come back to this same spot every spring. There was an extra bedroom if anyone wants to join us. ;) A few recommended places from this trip and last years: -Stella’s. We went here for brunch two days in a row. In Gulfport, delicious, and queer! -Bought our kites at Windworks in Madeira Beach -Fort De Soto County Park. The softest sand I’ve ever felt. Free indoor showers. -The Island Grille & Raw Bar in Tierra Verde. Big dining patio and play area for kids. -Honeymoon Island -Olde Bay Cafe in Dunedin -St. Pete Bicycle. Rented bikes and trailer and cruised on a bike trail along the Bay. -The Conch Republic Grill in North Redington Beach In the future, I’d like to -camp or cabin at Fort De Soto or another beach park -swim with manatees? -bike on the Pinellas Trail -check out some of the St. Petersburg breweries -explore Braedonton, Myakka, and beyond… Our time in the Carolinas was the heart of our trip. It was so nice and relaxing to visit family and friends in Beaufort, SC and Holden Beach, NC. Sharing meals at home and out. Getting out on the water to kayak and fish and swim. Sharing stories around a fire. Even watching TV together. I could make a list of the places we went or ate, but really it was just about being with people who we care about and don’t get to see very often. Because they were also Jen’s family and friends first, it was meaningful for me to get to visit their homes and get to know them better. Of course, everyone we stayed with loved to hang with Oscar which made it especially relaxing for us. We knew the drive north would be long, but we broke it up with visits with friends (and their kiddos!) in Durham and Chicago, and a night at the Natural Bridge State Resort park in Kentucky. There was a moment in Kentucky when we missed breakfast at the resort restaurant and drove around hangry, when things could have gone south, but instead we made the best of lunch for breakfast, and a hike where we coaxed Oscar along by peering into tree stumps and behind rocks for bears, before getting on the road again. Ask Oscar what his favorite part of the trip was, and he replies “looking for bears.” (My favorite/proudest moment was after I was in a panic because I had accidently locked the keys and Oscar in the jeep and was in the gas station calling the cops, Jen successfully and calmly coached Oscar through the window to unlock his door with his toes.)
Grateful to have a choice, but still often thwarted by this question. So I'm gonna put some of my tried and true ideas in one place for me to scroll through, share, or reference when away from home. And because I live thirty minutes from the grocery store, here I am on Friday sitting in my part-time office in Washburn, trying to decide what I want to eat tonight, this weekend, what the rest of my family wants, what will get used and not go to waste... Nothing brings on my anxiety like the possibility of wasting food. Or packing.
When several of my friends share a link, I will read it. This morning it was this article. I have no doubt that Trump's plan is to "become tremendously, and untraceably, rich, by looting any coffers that come within reach." The possibility of a coup? I needed my dad's opinion on that. I emailed him a link to the article and asked for his thoughts. This is what he wrote back: "Magdalen, Well, it is scary stuff. But even if completely true and not exaggerated, remember, this is a big country--a huge geography and a huge population--for any 'coup' to subdue--and a majority of the people who voted, voted for Hillary--and half or more of those who voted for Trump are not his loyal base. Also remember (if you are fearful), we have a big military with strong traditions. Of all Federal institutions, the military was the earliest to be integrated--and today is the most thoroughly integrated. Professional soldiers of the highest rank and of many diverse backgrounds in this country take great pride in the oath they take to protect the Constitution--not the president--they are duty bound to defy any order that they deem to be unlawful. Trump is playing with fire--and in my opinion he is going to get himself burned if not hung (metaphorically speaking) and no private security force of 'hired guns' is going to save him. Hopefully it doesn't come to 'coups' either from within or without. We do have checks and balances in this country, and ways of deposing dictators short of civil war--Jefferson Davis, Hughey Long, General MacArthur, Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, and a few others found this out. But in the end, Trump and his little 'inner circle' will be up against 'the American people'. If they think on some level the people 'will get tired of protesting'--they should think again--and when congress and the courts join the protest, THEY will be backed by our military--not the other way around. Dad" I exhale as I read his words. I believe them. I am grateful for my dad. Grateful for those who serve. Still grateful to be an American. (Even with Canada winking at me from across the lake.) I've been feeling a need to read some real stories to balance all the theory (of why Trump was elected, of what he will do). I appreciated today when a rugby friend shared this video along with her family story:
"My paternal grandfather came to the USA after serving with the British Merchant Marines during WWI. He was born in Japan and liked it here so he stayed. He opened a restaurant and married a fifth generation German American. They had 4 children, one would go on and serve in the Korean War as an interpreter for the USA army. On December 7, 1941 the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor and the events that would unfold would forever define my life. Of the events the one that sticks out most for me is when my grandmother (a natural born citizen) lost her citizenship because she refused to divorce my grandfather.... they were in love no less. I grew up knowing all this, knowing not only did my ancestors struggle to be with the ones they loved but that I myself would struggle as well for different reasons. I fear for what the repercussions will be in light of recent hasty actions. It has been nearly 3/4 of a century and I am 2 generations removed and yet it has shaped my life, my career as a history teacher and my desire for equality for all in a country that has fostered the dreams of many." I've also been thinking of and collecting family stories. How did I come to be (educated, rural, hard-working, liberal...)? How did our ancestors weather the hardest times? (binding together, snapping beans...) And I started a list of books I want to read. A Hope More Powerful than the Sea is at the top, followed by some on this list of "Books to Help Kids Understand What It's Like to Be a Refugee." What's your story? What are you reading? UPDATE: My newsfeed brought me these story-based articles today and I'm so appreciative.
So many beautiful familiar faces filling the main street of our small town. Walking down the middle of the road while the sidewalks are slick with ice. To the lake. Children playing and women’s voices singing Ojibwemowin on the ice. I'm glad I can linger. I stop by the farm. Lean against the woodstove and talk with my mom. Leave Oscar to nap with my dad. I don't mind the rain on the windshield as I cry to a Dear Sugar podcast while I drive to Washburn. Remember the rain in Cologne the morning the election results came in. Can't think of a better way to spend the afternoon than finishing a puzzle and eating soup with Theresa, accompanied by the chatter of Svea and one of her besties playing nearby. Leslie texts a picture of her Aunt marching in Paris and asks, "wanna be political with me?" Jen has a couple hours at home between dogsled trips and coming to meet us in town.
It makes me so happy when I can clean out the fridge and make a super delicious meal with what needs to be used. A definite overall magic moment in my book. Especially when I can share it with friends. :) Here are a few recent examples: 12/3/16 A grouse flew into a post in the dog kennel yesterday and killed itself, so Jen cleaned it, brought it home, and sautéed it up for dinner. I made a version of this yummy barley pilaf to go with it using kale and squash from the garden, and red peppers and honey mushrooms from the freezer. 12/12/16 Katelyn gave us a huge fillet of Salmon that she caught while working in Alaska, so I made our go-to salmon meal (below) with steamed broccoli and roasted squash. I’ve never loved this meal as leftovers though. That is until I came across this soup recipe today. I subbed the raw fish, squash, and kale for my already cooked leftovers and this soup was ready in the time it took to heat it all up. Swirl in some sriracha. So good! 1/5/16
I was sifting through our freezer as we made our meal plan for the week and came across a meaty chicken carcass and a venison roast. I wasn’t in the mood for chicken soup, but chicken tortilla soup for some reason sounded good. So I tried out this recipe. It was pretty damn good. And made a lot. The next morning Jen threw the frozen venison roast with some water and salt and pepper in the crockpot. She asked me to get potatoes boiling when I got home, but by the time I made it home, I was too hungry and cold for all that, so I just put the soup leftovers on the stove to heat up, and we grazed on the venison as Jen shredded it. After eating and thinking about how to package the leftovers, I said to Jen: “I feel like I want to make brown rice, put the shredded venison with it and slather this soup over the top.” So that’s what I did. I brought some of it along to a blog night at Kaite’s house. Threw it in a pyrex with some cheese mixed in. Viola! Leftovers become casserole! We ate that one up before I could get a pic. It wasn't nearly as pretty as it was tasty though. Living in an isolated area, and with work that changes with the seasons, I sometimes struggle to find friends whose schedule's mesh with mine. I’ve had varied success scheduling meet-ups via facebook, but I wonder if there is a way to advertise my availability in a more lasting and universally accessible way. Like here? My weekly schedule changes every season (sometimes every month), but January through March is pretty consistent, and more relaxed, since the farm is quiet. Mondays and Fridays, I’m usually in Washburn while Oscar is at daycare. Kid-less lunch date? Or playdate with kiddos after I pick him up at 3:30? Wednesdays, Oscar and I try to make it to storytime around 10am at the Bayfield Library, then head down to the Rec Center for Gym Kids at noon. He goes to the farm for nap and I can play for a bit at the hill before I start my bartending shift. Come be my lift buddy? Join the Women’s XC-ski group? Or just visit come visit me at the bar? Thursdays?? (It’s nice to have at least one of those days each week.)
Saturdays (and some Sundays) I’m at the hill noon to 4:30pm. Ski with me before or after my shift? Or let me make you a drink? Tuesdays and Sundays are Jen’s days off, so we might try to get you to come skiing with us. Or we might say we are going to go and then spend the day doing chores and vegging at home. :) I’ve learned no matter where I live or where my people live, we won’t always see each other. Even the city can feel lonely. We are separated not just by physical distance, but by the going-ons of our life. We find connection in moments that can be shared in varied time and place-- emails, a picture posted to Instagram, a recalled memory. And then sometimes there is a window of opportunity to be together again. We share a room on the top floor of her aunt’s crazy old house where her cousin’s kids usually stay. Two mattresses on the floor on either side of the room where the ceiling slants with the roofline. We are both tired from travelling, but stay up late talking in the dark. Like college. It’s been fifteen years since we shared a dorm room, but it’s always just as easy. I keep thinking of more to say and ask, but finally will myself to sleep. We have the next four days together. Perfect late breakfast of baguette and cheese and honey and pear. Make a loose plan for the day: take a train into the city, get off at Notre Dame and see how far we wander. Unsure of how to dress--colder than I anticipated and threats of rain, but at least in November there is no line to enter the cathedral. We walk north to place des vosges, buy a macaroon and a meringue tart to eat in the park, then over along the canal. On the sidewalk above there are booths of antiques, and Leslie is pulled in to look. All the old stuff stresses me out to sift through, like helping mom clean out my grandma’s house. I don’t want to accumulate stuff. My attention drifts below to houseboats, decks garnished with plants and bikes and furniture. A playground on the other side. I’m missing Jen & Oscar a bit. I imagine sitting together in a pretty spot and watching him play. We cross the river and walk toward the latin district. Find a cute bar. Order wine. Contemplate the French words on the chalkboard menu and then find out they aren’t serving food anyway, just charcuterie. The waiter brings a huge plate of deli meat and bread. I wish I could bring this all home with me--Leslie, the wine and bread, new places to explore. Import it into my life once a week. I’m glad we have these days to catch up, but miss when we were able to have a weekly scheduled lunch date. I remember her sad face during our last college lunch together. Me saying, we’ll always be friends, we’ll visit each other. Her saying, but it won’t be like this. Each morning we sleep in, visit with Aunt Sally and eat a little something, take the train into Paris to wander together, take the train home for dinner in the dusk of city, of the supermoon behind thick clouds. We find our way below the Louvre to buy perfume. Eat crepes and ceasar salad with students talking American politics at the table next to us. Visit D’orsay in the rain. Marble sculptures. Famous paintings. Wander into a gold-gilded room on our way out. Drink rose'. Admire the stylish older woman at the table next to us in a feather coat. Sally makes us paupiette de dinde with wild mushrooms for dinner. Then MontMarte and buying art. Onion soup. Shallots in basil oil. On the last day, Beaujolais Nouveau Day, Sally takes us on a walking tour: “Leave the Austerlitz station and walk through the botanical gardens and around to the Roman Arena. After leaving the arena, cross the street and walk up the stairs to reach rue Mouffetard. When you walk back up this street, wind your way to the Paris Pantheon. After that go down the rue de la Montagne de Sainte Genviève. When you get to the bottom of the hill, along the Seine River, stop at the Shakespeare and Company book shop. You can then continue with Notre Dame across the river.” So glad to have this walk documented. Look forward to sharing it with Oscar someday. How many people have walked down this same street? How many that I knew? We eat lunch at a more “touristy” restaurant, but it still tastes good and is only ten euro for three courses: soup, paprika chicken and fries, apple tart. Share a bottle of wine with Laura and Kelvin, Sally’s other house guests this week, friends of her daughter. Walk along the river to the Eiffel tower. See it sparkle. Our legs are tired from walking. Make a detour to the grocery store on the way back to buy wine and gifts for home. Share a bottle of champagne at home with Sally in the kitchen. Talk about our families and children's books. Laura and Kelvin arrive home and we eat raclette (shaved cheese) at the large table for dinner. On the plane now to Minneapolis. Chasing the sun. A slowly widening orange horizon. Watched Ghostbusters on the flight to KEF with Les. Never really been a fan of action movies, but this one so good for so many reasons: smart, funny, women (and that wink), can’t wait to share it with O in a few years. So glad a movie like this exists now. That Leslie feels the same. Our overlapping feminism. Talk about grandmas, boston marriages, the Bechdel test, Kate McKinnon and all the rest of the funny smart girls that are ruling right now. She suggested we say goodbye as we got off the plane, but I didn’t because I knew we would then be in line together, which was true, but then we were through and rushing away to stand in line at our busy gates. I tried to find her and give a better hug, but there was a sea of people between us and they would board my flight any minute. I watch another movie on my flight to MSP. Infinitely Polar Bear. Reminds me we all just do our best, don’t really know the answers. It lets me cry a bit. Feeling emotional today. Didn’t sleep great last night. My period. Transition. Looked forward to this trip all fall and now it’s done. But I’m ready to be home. With my family. In our little house. To plan our bigger house. To talk about Trump with my parents. To wait for snow. Don’t have to wait long as there is snow on the ground and specks in the air as I train and walk in the dark and cold to Lila’s lit second story apartment. Refreshing to be outside when others aren’t, after a day of airports and planes. And then welcomed into Lila’s cozy space to lay and chat. Share uncertain feelings about Trump and what’s to come, shock of his victory, sorting through the surrounding fears. What is useless panic? Are there ways to challenge? To prepare? The pull of Standing Rock. Debate ideas of going back to another way of living, closer to the land, my views on how the affordable care act is not as affordable for rural people, somehow jump to memories of college rugby days, a time of my life that was so formative and now feels so far away. Glad though to know Lila then. And now. Sleep. Shower. Wake up to a text from Jen of her birthday buck. Make tea. Lila wakes. Recommends the book Ash, a queer cinderella story. Maybe her favorite book. Listens to the audio version often. And it talks about a time that thinking was beginning to split between the old witchy medicine, fairy tales, etc. and male doctors and their methods. Why did that ever come about we wonder together? Patriarchy? Men wanting to be the ones in the know, even when they were just pretending, playing out their experiments on our bodies, murdering, “doctor knows best.” Help her bring her car to the mechanic, then start home. Took 35w out of the city, but then exited onto 8 towards Wisconsin—fewer miles, driven at a slower pace, should get home about the same time. I’m sitting now at a quiet clean McDonalds in small Chisago City. “Gateway to the Lakes” written on the water tower. Pop music. Shy teenagers filling my order. Two breakfast burritos, a hashbrown patty, and milk for five dollars. Even fill my thermos two-thirds full with hot water, and give me a packet of real honey for my tea. A very long travel day. Goodbye to Jen and Oscar. Drive to Minneapolis. MSP to KEF to CDG to DUS. Waiting for flights. Various trains. Getting a message to Steph that I’ve arrived at the station a few miles from their house. And then she is there, opening the door to the kebab shop, with month-old Luisa Maria wrapped in her coat. We are together in her car, the same one we rode in three years ago from her wedding in Cologne to Annalisa’s wedding in Pantelleria. She is giving me a tour of her house. I am sitting on her couch drinking peppermint tea with Portuguese honey and brandy. My long day is over and I am so happy to be here. I sleep upstairs in a nest of blankets. Wake up wondering the results of the election, and am a little worried that I don’t have a celebratory message from anyone. Take a shower and then go downstairs where Steph is on the couch, nursing Luisa. “I am so sorry, Magdalen.” She says as I come into the room. I send Jen a message. Begin a scroll through Facebook, to see what people are reading and sharing. Spend most of my morning on a collection of Opinion pieces from the New York Times. Steph is on her phone too. We read aloud the bits that resonate: “For now, we need to breathe, stand tall and adjust to this new reality as best we can. We need — through writing, through protest, through voting in 2018 and 2020 — to be the checks and balances our government lacks so that we can protect the most defenseless among us, so that we can preserve the more perfect union America has long held as the ideal. We have to fight hard, though I do not yet know what that fight looks like.” I am glad to be with Steph. She has always helped me see American politics from a different perspective. (Years ago, expressing embarrassment about having Bush for President, she succinctly replied, “We had Hitler.”) This time though it really does feel like we are in it together. Comparing the shock of Brexit, to the shock we are feeling now. Returning to conversations from previous visits with Steph and Martin, Annalisa and Mattia, all frustrated with the anti-immigration/racist thinking that has been building in their countries as well. Germany, worried about a population decline, gives money to German families that have children, and yet maintains a strict immigration policy. Immigrants and refugees arrive daily on Italian shores and only the very minimum of support is provided to house, and feed, and integrate them. Annalisa provides counseling to immigrant and refugee women for free two days a week. Mattia, her husband, works as the director at a refugee center, but the working conditions are so stressful and underfunded, he knows he needs to make a change. I hold Luisa, smell her new baby small. Roll it all around in my head--- the possible consequences for my family, for other Americans, for the world. Try to find a bright side: Elizabeth Warren 2020? Or someone I haven’t heard of yet, the best person, to lead after this, that we can all get behind. Steph chops potatoes and salad. Luisa sleeps. We play briscola. Think of going for a walk, but then it is raining again. Facetime with Jen and Michael and Oscar. I had texted Michael earlier: “Thank you for holding my wife and son when I can’t.” Now he reads aloud words from his fiance: “The world shifted last night. Some voted for it, some voted against it. Some didn't vote. But we are all responsible for how it works. And we are better together than we are separate…” The next morning, I make us an “American” breakfast of eggs and leftover potatoes. We pick up Annalisa from the airport and then drive into Cologne for a few impromptu hours in the city: walking past the cathedral on our way to a free concert (Luisa’s first), a stop at the bookstore so Steph can nurse, and I can find a map of South East Asia, and then kebabs “on the hand” to eat on our way home. The rest of our time together is exactly as Annalisa had predicted in the email/poem she sent to us the week before (with my pics added and elaborations in italics). US! meeting luisa maria hugging you and seeing your beautiful faces...hair...bodies...hands seeing martin and hearing his bursting laugh walking around steph and martins home smelling it lying on their coach chatting for hours drinking tea holding luisa maria seeing steph breastfeeding her (maybe?) yes, and seeing my bloody nipples, steph adds waking up at night with luisa crying loud (maybe?) the parents yes, but not so much their guests cooking and drinking wine afternoon walks around their neighborhood their homemade bread for dinner looking at old photos and taking new ones listening to steph and magdalen speaking their funny Italian steph and martin’s marital bickering in German, all of us conversing in an evolving English, in translations, in body language, and so much laughter talking about life, lives, and about meanings remembering and dreaming looking at maps planning wisconsin winter january 2018 australian reunion 2020-something? talking about luisa maria and oscar for hours listening the 2 mamas sharing mamas experiences all of us sharing our challenges, joys, and heartbreaks of tracking ovulation, fluctuating hormones, AI, IVF, miscarriage, birth always always dreaming the days of our kiddos growing together maybe listening to a trumpet? or two? posing our butts sleeping under the same roof and seeing your pajamas making breakfast together laughing and crying This time, I totally don't care about places (except for "The Home"), but only about US!!!!! Now it’s Sunday and I’m on a train to Paris to meet Leslie and her Aunt. Unlike the first long travel day, this trip is not exhausting, but exactly what I need. City center to city center. Four hours to reflect on my time with Steph, Annalisa, Martin and Luisa, on my time away from Jen and Oscar, on my time to come with Leslie and her Aunt. I scroll through the pictures I took and the pictures Jen sent me of Oscar. I am so grateful that I can have this time away and that they can have this time together at home without me. Animals in the house and all.
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AuthorsMagdalen Dale and Kaite Sweval grew up a layer apart, overlapping and paralleling. Belonging to the shores of Lake Superior and yet not quite belonging. Laughing and dreaming on the bench outside the ferry booth as Mag passed the time and Kaite chose her time. Left to explore as soon as they could. And then as adults returned home, perhaps to their surprise. But glad to have each other... ‘cause we know there is strength in the differences between us and comfort where we overlap. Archives
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